Just a few hours ago..
I got really really pissed
I felt like slashing my arm
and running around the house
screaming in pain..
But..It's strange how a book can
turn your mood or feelings around..
Although the book's about girls
slashing their arms..snorting drugs..
screwing around and some ending up
in a mental hospital..It made the anger
and whatever else I was feeling go away..
The book made me realise the consequences
of doing irrational things to myself and
getting angry over something small..
But you know what?
It's alright if I get angry and sensitive and
emotional..
My crimson tide's not arrived YET!!!!
That's why I've been like that for quite
some time now..
I thought things over after the book
and concluded that..I'm gonna give you
the benefit of an adult..I understand this
is your first..I understand..
But how come it went smoothly before..
Oh right..the problems come eventually..
I forgot that part..
Just please...Think before you do things?
At times..you think about yourself..and
only yourself..You do..I'll explain it to you
if it happens again..For now..I'm tired..
And I'm just gonna let things pass me by and
not get to me..Just this once I'll let it get to me..
Sigh..I'm beginning to be immune to all this..
Oh..no..I take that back..
This is just gonna accumulate and one day
it's just gonna come all over you like an
avalanche..

Was speaking to one of my friends on the
phone..I blurted out how I felt and everything..
She claimed she understood what I was feeling..
But is she really? Ah well..
I told her that I've not been out in a long long time..
As in..Having lots of fun..And she agreed and said
she felt the same way too..That she wanted to go
out here and there and then relax at Sentosa..
Maaaaaaan...Am I dying for that..;)
Maybe one day next week..since they start their
March hols..I really can't wait for that day to come..
Hope this time they don't back out at the last minute..
But you know what? Just in case..I'm not gonna
count on it and get my hopes too high up..
It's only gonna happen if they're not tired..or
having this on..and that on..
Hmmm..I'll just have to wait and see,I guess..

Moving on..tomorrow..St.Margeret's Band Concert..
Man..I can't wait any longer already..
Call me a freak or whatever..
But it's been a long time since I heard a band
play..I know their Band's a Gold with honours Band..
They ARE gonna sound really good..;)
Before that..I think I'll be meeting Precious and
Yani abit later on then go to the concert hall..
I hope to go galavanting after that..;)
None of us have a curfew I think..
Woohoo!!!
I'm gonna try and ask my mum if she can
Give me my allowance 2 days before hand..
If not..a broke girl tomorrow I'll be..;(


Hope things go smoothly tomorrow..
Oh yeah..I'm not supposed to get my
hopes high..Gee..



Mend my heart..Will you?